quinta-feira, maio 08, 2008

Ele há fatos e factos...

Há uns dias recebi no meu Gmail, um e-mail do Rafeiro Perfumado, que, gentilmente convidava todos os bloggers endereçados a fazer um post à meia-noite e um de quarta feira em forma de protesto contra o novo acordo ortográfico, e colocar na barra lateral umas coisas engraçadas... Infelizmente (ou não) tal não foi possível, por questões pessoais, mas, o repto ficou, e, cá estou eu para falar sobre essa temática que está tão na berra, e, sobre a qual, já muito se disse, mas há sempre algo mais a dizer.

Se há algo que vai mudar drasticamente, segundo o novo acordo, são os "cc" e os "pp" que vão cair. Ora, se nalguns casos faz todo o sentido que o "c" ou o "p" caiam, porque são mudos, casos de "cacto", "óptimo", "acção", "baptismo", etc. Outras há que não é bem assim...

Vou então catar a atenção do leitor para alguns exemplos mais ridículos...E sim, já enunciei um deles! Imaginem, que a partir de agora, a condição dum bom orador, já não passa por captar a atenção dos ouvintes, mas por catar...bom... E se os ouvintes tiverem lavado o cabelo?

Bom, mas há uma coisa positiva, mesmo muito positiva com o novo acordo... Vai deixar de haver raptos! Mas, por outro lado, vai passar a haver mais ratos, o que não é necessariamente melhor. Se fossem ao menos ra... vá, deixemos a ordinarice de parte!

O que é engraçado de ver, é que nunca mais vamos discutir factos. A partir de agora discutem-se fatos! Já estou a imaginar o primeiro-ministro gritar da tribuna: Massimo Dutti! E um daqueles deputados gordos e velhos a aplaudir, grunhindo lá atrás, "Muito bem", seguido de uma resposta do PSD, do tipo "Tu querias era este Georgio Armani!" Bom, escusado será dizer, que, estas mudanças, vão levar rapidamente ao suicídio de Francisco Louçã, que, se antes até trazia alguns factos bem incómodos, o único fato que tem em casa deve ser o fato-macaco! Não, senhor Alberto J. Jardim! Não é fato de macaco, esse continua o senhor com a exclusividade...
E se antes, andar bem parecido era importante para se ser um bom argumentador, agora é indispensável. Pois, se antes, "de facto, o senhor tem razão", agora, "de fato, o senhor tem razão", isto é, só temos razão se ostentarmos a gravatinha, as calcinhas bem passadinhas a ferro e o bom do jaquetão! Mais uma razão para o suicídio do sr. Louçã...
E já agora, questiono-me... Qual é a diferença entre um casamento e uma união de fato?

Outra coisa muito gira, é que deixa de haver pactos e passa a haver patos. Estou já a imaginar os bons dos comunas em excursão à Polónia e pedirem todos um "pato de Varsóvia". O mais provável é que saiam de lá de barriga vazia, porque agora os patos são outros, ora, por exemplo o pato de estabilidade e crescimento.
E agora imagine-se, que há uns tempos se assinou o pato para a justiça! Tenho a impressão que à educação calhou uma vaca...

É assim a nova ortografia! Subam-se os fatos, e esqueçam-se os factos!Façam-se patos, que o que não falta é quem coma!

136 comentários:

Balbino disse...

Ora aqui está mais um blog com alguém que ainda pensa. Bem-vindo ao meu, serás sempre bem-vindo!

Compadre Alentejano disse...

Gostei do post e do blog. Vou trancrever o post sobre o acordo e colocar o link do blog.
Obrigado pela dica.
Um abraço
Compadre Alentejano

Aline Cedrac disse...

Extremamente brilhante!Posso dizer que és um gajo eloquentíssimo e ficamos por aqui?!

Patos de Varsóvia FTW!

Casemiro dos Plásticos disse...

Sempre em alta este blog, belissimo post.
+e uam vergonha este corrector, ridiculo no minimo...:S

bom fds.
abraço.

mac disse...

Este acordo só serve paa se vender mais livros no Brasil.

Abrenúncio disse...

É isso tudo e muito mais, caro Tiago.
Este acordo serve na perfeição os interesses económicos do Brasil, país que sem dúvida será o maior beneficiado com as alterações.
Tem piada, mas não estou a ver o Reino Unido a mudar a ortografia em função dos Estados Unidos, do Canadá, ou da Austrália. O mesmo com a França em relação a qualquer outro país francófono, idem a Alemanha, a Espanha, etc...
Saudações do Marreta.

White_Fox disse...

Por acaso gostei muito do post e estava a pensar fazer um sobre o mesmo tema!
E ja votei aki ao lado (3ªopção)!
E desde já mt obrigado pelo teu comentário!

Rafeiro Perfumado disse...

Ganda Tiago, é assim mesmo, dá-lhes! Um grande abraço e contra o AO, marchar, marchar!

Zé Povinho disse...

Há sempre quem lucre com estas inutilidades, e talvez seja esta a razão da perda de tempo em tentar uma missão impossível. As línguas têm a dinâmica de evolução, e as culturas pela sua diversidade geram alterações que os linguistas não poderão nunca prever.
Foi pura perda de tempo, que nós pagámos a peso de ouro.
Abraço do Zé

JPinto disse...

Eu já assinei a petição e pus o link no Carimbo Azul.

Abraço

Enfim... disse...

lol eu ainda n me revoltei loool

bjokas

Carol disse...

Totalmente de acordo contigo! aliás, já abordei este tema no Notas Soltas, Ideias Tontas mas de uma forma bem menos divertida do que tu fazes aqui.

Contra o AO, sempre!

Anónimo disse...

Tens toda a razão!
Quem inventou esta treta de acordo, só pensou nos seus interesses e não no povo! Por mim,vou continuar a escrever como me ensinaram.

bjs
julie

peace_love disse...

Aquela gente tem é muito tempo livre...isto não tem sentido nenhum..

Rp disse...

Por mim acabava-se simplesmente com essa coisa da ortografia, cada um escrevia como "kizexe" :| ahah
abraços

Pedro Pisco disse...

Caro Tiago!

Ora boas!

Cá estou de volta depois de convalescer de uma doença algures entre os dedos e os neurónios, que me desinspirou ao ponto de me calar.

Mas a maleita foi-se e reinspirei-me de novo.

Patos? Patos somos todos, com ou sem acordo...

Aliás, no meio da convalencença, deparei-me várias vezes com o fenómeno paradoxal da Democracia, às voltas pelo meu cérebro, qual abutre à espera de vez...

Quer maior paradoxo, que passármos a vida a eleger pessoas, cuja única coisa que fazem é lixar quem os elege?

Mas nós gostamos... Ó se gostamos...

Abraço

Alien David Sousa disse...

T.já estou cansada deste tema e muito sinceramente - infelizmente- não acredito que a petição nos ajude. As línguas são mutáveis, todos nós o sabemos mas o que estão a fazer à nossa é uma atrocidade.Assim sendo, deixa-me que te dê os parabéns pelo teu texto. Deu para rir com a nossa desgraça.

Saudações alienígenas

João disse...

Bom post, tens muita razao naquilo que dizes, há coisa mesmo ridiculas por vezes!

Abraço

Tiago disse...

Eu também não concordo com o acordo e também já assinei a petição.

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Muito fixe!!!
Estou a gostar imenso de te ler!

Parabéns!

Este pato serve é para encher a barriguinha de alguns!!!

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